My kids love the song Tik Tok by Kesha.
Though I have explained to Cowgirl that the sentence “DJ blow my speakers up” is figurative and just means that the singer likes the music really loud, she is horrified and sings her own version of the song, which she insists is how the real song goes:
“tik tok on the clock, dj DON’T blow my speakers up tonight, I’m the fight, till uh see a sunlight, tik tok on the clock but the party won’t stop it now, ohohoooooh, ohohoooooooh.”
I am usually pretty North Korea when it comes to media (I filter everything and only approved sources that are sending the approved message make the cut) but I have been more lenient with pop music in the past year. Growing up, I remember listening to
And their completely dirty meaning went right over my head. I thought the first song was about how sweet his girlfriend was (I’m hot, sticky sweet, from my head to my feet – that meant he had a huge crush on her, you know, from head to toe), the second about falling in love while conversing with a coworker while riding an actual elevator (living it up while I’m going down – that means falling in love is what makes you feel rich), the third was mysterious to me but I knew it was comparative, not literal, and my Mom was smart in telling me it meant doing something for the first time. She never specified what that something was and it never occurred to me to ask. I assumed it was universal and the specific song was about being touched by LOVE for the first time (with your heartbeat next to mine – she didn’t mean naked or anything, she just meant they were standing in the same room).
I don’t remember my folk’s listening to anything I couldn’t also hear. I mean, the worst thing I remember hearing was The Devil Went Down To Georgia, which I didn’t realize contained a cuss word until I was in 8th grade (yes, I have always been so lame, and yes my kids know that song). My mom loved Hall and Oates, Chicago, Laura Branigan, and I remember she would tape the “top ten” music videos every week and we could replay the VHS as often as we wanted. The worst thing I ever saw was Don Johnson apparently pick up a lady in a bar and have a one-night-stand, although I never realized it at the time. I thought he talked to a nice lady, went home, then left for work the next morning wearing an identical pink shirt and white blazer. Hard worker, early riser, that sort of thing.
My children, however, are not allowed to listen to my playlist. There are plenty of things they could hear on there, like Bonnie Raitte, Counting Crows, Goo Goo Dolls, Journey, Creed…but there are also things I would just as soon they not, like Snoop Dogg, Jamie Foxx, Alanis Morissette, Avril Lavigne (I mean, they understand that I’m the mother effing princess, but I don’t want them to know that specific terminology).
I have even had to explain to them what ‘sexy’ means (thank you, Kenny Chesney, and yes I still love you and I do think that about your tractor). I told them it is a word that means especially attractive, but it is a confusing word because it has different, grown-up meanings, and that children who use it sound silly because they are usually not providing the proper context; as they grew up they would understand how to use it correctly but it would be inappropriate to use it now. My Farmer managed not to reveal his panic while he overheard this conversation, as his knee-jerk reaction was something along the lines of just-tell-them-don’t-ever-say-that-or-else! Evidently my kids don’t want to sound like morons because I’ve never heard them use it.
I did reconsider my new music policy when, after listening to Tik Tok several times, Farmer Boy asked me “Mom, what’s a girl’s junk?”
I paused, trying to keep a p-p-p-poker face, p-p-poker face . “Well, what do you think that means?”
“Well, stuff. Like, you know, her purse.” He told me.
Whew! How do I spell relief? J-U-N-K-I-S-A-P-U-R-S-E.
I do think media is different than when I was a kid, and I most certainly censor a great deal more than my parents did. And although I do agree that kids will not “get it” until they are old enough and will ask questions when they are confused…I still feel it is necessary to censor. In my opinion, popular music (and television, and advertising, and media in general) are much more clear and crass in their meanings, as well as more extreme in order to be memorable. My kids don’t watch music videos. Well, that’s not entirely true…if they like a song I will often preview it on youtube and if I feel it’s okay they can see it (here’s an example). But Weezer’s world record dodge-ball game seems as innocuous to me as the videos I watched. There is so much over-the-top sexuality in videos today…I’m as uncomfortable with my children watching those as My Farmer was during the “what sexy means” conversation.
I’m just glad that they haven’t asked me what Weezer means when they sing “Like marrying a beeotch, and having seven keeeods….” In the song Troublemaker. I like the point of that song, which is that it’s perfectly okay to be completely different, to just be yourself even if you don’t fit with the mainstream. I want my kids to go around singing “Never been a faker!” I’m not worried about the part where they call books stupid because, well, my kids know that must be a joke, because NO ONE in the world thinks that (and that even if Weezer says stupid, they aren’t allowed to).
I know a lot of what is not age-appropriate goes right over kid’s heads, and the older the kid the better their ability to manage/understand it. I have also found that parenting is an as-you-go kind of thing, and what I thought was a big deal five years ago I am not bothered by now. But I look at the girls in my age group, those who came right before and after me, and I see a plague of eating disorders and a sharp rise in plastic surgery following behind photoshop. And it makes me wonder. I know there is a fine line between too much and not enough censorship, and I guess for now we are erring on the side of caution. Your thoughts on this?
I also find it humorous that for the last four days I have tried to write a short, funny, light-hearted post and this is what I keep coming up with. Close enough!
My mom was in her mid-20s when MTV went on the air with music videos. It was HUGE. She listened to many of the artists you mentioned, as well, and we were allowed to watch MTV. I remember Headbangers Ball, and Downtown Julie Brown coming atcha live from Club MTV. It wasn’t until I became a full-blown teenager when MTV and it’s content began going downhill. My mother feebly tried to shield us from it, but it was no use. Nothing and no one was going to stop me from aspiring to become a sexy blonde bombshell like the girl in Warrant’s “Cherry Pie,” or Billy Idol’s “Cradle of Love.” It wasn’t until they stopped playing music videos and started showing us The Real World that I, myself, became disinterested. Nowadays, with my kids, they hear what’s on the radio, which (at times) isn’t entirely appropriate. My son never cared too much for music, though, and he didn’t actually pay attention to the lyrics…or so I thought. It wasn’t until I overheard him singing from the backseat, “Blame it on the a-a-a-a-a-alcohol,” that I started being more diligent about what they hear. I do like country music, though, and it seems to be less questionable. Good post!
I laughed so hard at your comment “Whew! How do I spell relief? J-U-N-K-I-S-A-P-U-R-S-E.” You have a serious way with words.
I think you are totally right – everything we think was ‘questionable’ from our youth takes a pale backseat in comparision to things now-a-days… Think about Madonna, who (gasssp) wore a pointy bra and sang Like A Virgin, then think about Brittney Spears, who often wears much less than a pointy bra and sings I’m a Slave For You. You pick which song has a trickier message – I think it is clear.
I always thought buying CD’s at Wal-Mart or wherever they sell the “sensored” version of music was a total copout, but that was before I thought about having to limit a little person’s exposure to different kinds of music because of language. I guess it is one artist at a time, and there are no cusswords in I’m a Slave For You, so maybe I am just kidding myself. Can you say I LOVE BRYAN REAGAN??
LOL Shannon, that is one of the songs on my playlist (Blame it)! And my experiences with MTV are similar in many ways. I think one of the ways my mom controlled it was taping the videos herself…I never saw the Warrant or Billie Idol video, though I know the lyrics by heart (of course, I thought they just really loved actual pie). We didn’t have cable when I was younger, and honestly that is part of why I don’t have cable now. That and I’m incredibly cheap.
When I was younger I remeber listening to Janet Jackson, Paula Abdul (they were my faves). I also listened to Michael Jackson, Prince, Bobby Brown, Debbie Gibson, NKOTB, and now I’m drawing a complete blank. My mom didn’t really mind my music choices. It was my older brother’s music she hated but he still listened to it. I remember he would blast it when she wasn’t home.
Anywho, I don’t let my kids listen to radio channels like 93.9 or 96.3. The car radio was ALWAYS on Radio Disney but for some reason they took it away. :0/ So, I’ll just put in their Radio Disney cd’s or I do let them listen to B98. I don’t know, I just don’t want them to hear things that I don’t think are appropriate. I know that they wouldn’t know what it meant (I’m sure their response would be something like what your son said) but still I just don’t let them. Maybe I’m just weird…..
I CAN’T STOP SINGING BLAME IT ON THE A-A-A-A-A-ALCHOHOL! hmmm… is it 5 o’clock somewhere???
Me too, Jan…I mean I listened to all the artists you listed. LOVED Michael. We danced to Prince and Bon Jovi songs at recess with a third-graders super cool boom box. In our stone-washed jean skirts over bright leggings. With scrunched socks and high tops, and arms covered with jelly bangles. Oh 1980s! How much fun were you?! My kids love radio disney too. I can still find it on the AM channel….but it comes and goes depending on where we are in the van. I, of course, don’t think you are weird being as I’m doing the same type of thing with my kids and music.
I always listen to that song when I’m working out. It’s become my private, pg-13, R and X rated music haven. I like to stretch out to Jamie Foxx. Why don’t you drive up here and we’ll go out tonight? LOL!
Stephanie, I was thinking the same thing about Madonna and Brittney…I was thinking of her newer song “three.” Which, of course, would not be a message kid’s would get (Dear Lord In Heaven I hope not!), but I watch a Brittney video and definately DO NOT want my kids seeing it. Like you said, the pointy bra was shocking at the time, I guess, but I just thought it looked weird. I didn’t want to wear a pointy bra myself. But I see Brittney’s videos and feel like they are, like Shannon commented earlier, something girls would want to act and look (and dance) like. I also think a lot of the messages in Brittney’s songs are “I will do anything you want” where as Madonna’s songs had a much stronger “girl power/I’m so awesome” message. I’d much rather my daughter feel like “experience has made me rich and now they’re after me” than “I’m a slave for you.” And what was considered the overt sexuality in Madonna’s videos? Brittney’s are borderline pornographic (I’m not picking on her. Most videos are like that. I watched Pokerface by lady GaGa yesterday and shut it down when the kids came in so they wouldn’t see the couch orgy).
That’s exactly what I mean about the difference between Brittney and Madonna – Madonna was very much do what you want and girl power in my mind, where Brittney’s later songs for sure seem to have only sex in them. Even “Papa Don’t Preach” had a message that was about her doing what she wanted, even though it was about pregnancy out of wedlock… Although, everything is relative, and I remember the controversy over Madonna’s video “Like A Prayer” – it probably depends on what is taboo at the time. BUT – everyone thought Madonna was over the top and crazy and she was totally controversial, where Brittney is accepted and loved and even though there has been drama in her personal life, it hasn’t been like there has been huge controversy over her actual music – the downside of being too tolerant? I don’t know – I SOOOO love your blog.
What an interesting point! I was thinking about Papa Don’t Preach as well, and felt, though it was controversial, it was handled well. I mean, I was just on the cusp of old enough to “get” that song…and so I remembered the video very clearly when I did connect the dots. It showed her as a young gal, highschool or just out of, with a boyfriend who loved her, in a big city with no job and an uncertain future, but in the end a Dad who loved her as well and she was struggling with a difficult choice…it was really pretty darn realistic and a great point that needed (and still needs) to be discussed. I am intrigued by your point about Brittney being loved and accepted despite her messages and behavior…I wonder if it is because she was a BABY when she became a star, whereas Madonna was in her 20s…people will always see Brittney as a little girl? Feel sorry for her choices and wait for her to grow up? I also agree our society in general is more tolerant, which in some ways is great. But I’m still not letting my kids watch her videos, LOL!
I think it is a good thing society is more tolerant … but sometimes I wonder if tollerating certain age-based behaviors from stars like Brittney, ex: smoking, drinking, sex, has caused a lowering of standards and expectations for young people. In this information age we know everything we want to and more about a person in a nanosecond. In our age, it was totally different, and I think less of a celebrity-obsessed culture. PS art is subjective, but artists should maybe consider their audience? How are you going to deal with it when the kids are bigger? Call me Tipper Gore Jr – all of my adolecent rebel hairs may have finally fallen out! We are getting ooold.
Yes, Tipper, you echo my thoughts exactly. Well, with the exception of you getting old part, and all your rebel hairs falling out…but some of them have, anyway. I figure I will take it a little at a time as they get old. I’ve already exposed them to far more this last year than I would have in the past (I mean, for goodness sake the song says “brush my teeth with a bottle of Jack”) but I have definately learned that what I think I will do rarely turns out to be what actually happens.
Art…what IS the definition of art when discussing music? Good. Quality. Music.
Personally I think Britney is an entertainer, not an artist, not a muscian (her Circus album is lifeless and heavily laden with computerized inhancements of her voice). IMO many people in the music industry right now are there because they want to be “famous”, not that they have much talent. Madonna certainly has talent which has allowed her to still be a household name 25 years later. I think people watch Brittney to see the train wreck she’s become, not because she does society any favors. And what sells? DRAMA! Brittney=drama, Lady Gaga=drama (have you seen the photos of her with a… um… male body part?). Everyone has to “one-up” to get noticed. I wonder what things will be like in 20 years… Crap I feel old. I need a drink. Blame it on the aaaaalcohol…
Anywoo, let me step down from my little soap box a sec and say “HI STEPHY!!!!”
I just want to say that I’ve REALLY been enjoying this blog! Been reading all your posts about music, and you’ve made me laugh, reminisce, think, cringe! I agree with Tarah’s last post regarding what sells nowadays. Seems like many if not most stars just want to push the envelope. I don’t have a problem with artists taking risks, and I don’t have a problem with artists trying to do things differently in order to make themselves stand out. I like change. I respect people with new ideas and unique qualities, even if I don’t agree with them or care to watch or listen to them in my home. Sometimes, like Jessica mentioned, I listen to certain songs and types of music when I’m working out or going out with the girls. I don’t necessarily listen to it at home. And I’m responsible when I select what music my children will listen to. What I have a problem with is disrespect and indecency. Kanye West stands out in a negative way, as do Britney Spears and Adam Lambert. They aren’t respectful AT ALL. There are other artists/entertainers who’ve pushed the envelope in a more positive way.
You are all awesome, I’m really enjoying this discussion. I agree, there are things I listen to and love because I am old enough for them to love them just b/c they are great songs, but I’m not really going to cheat on my man to git ahizzead or blame it on the a-a-a-a-a-alcohol…And I don’t think people who do those things are cool. I am old enough to have really decided my morals and am no longer young enough to be impressionable at all. I would not say that I don’t listen to disrespectful music b/c, duh, I have snoop on my ipod. As a teenager I think music was really important to me b/c it helped me think about/define who I was. I’m awfully glad that some of the stuff running around now wasn’t then…but then again, we did have marylin manson. I just go w/ my gut as to what my kids can handle or not, and this year I have allowed some things that I have thought was questionable (like Tik Tok) to see how it went. As long as junk is a purse, it’s okay with me.
this is the funniest thing i have read all day! i cant even start to list the songs i mis-intrepreted in my youth nor the ones my kids dont understand… fortunately for me, our kids favorite CD of the moment is Science by They My Be Giants.. seriously.
TARAH!!! HEY!!! I sooo have to get back in this discussion. 1st – Shannon, what did Adam Lambert do? I am totally out of touch… 2nd – miss Tarah, I totally agree that ‘people’ are facinated with rubbernecking to see the wreck of B’s life – but what in the world are we “grown ups” (I use that term with disdain) doing spending time worrying about that anyway? Do you think the little girls that are buying her albums are facinated for the same reason? When is a person old enough to decide not to idolize someone but just to be interested in what they do in their life? 3rd – Jessica – yes, we had Marilyn Manson – why do I feel so differently about it when it is something about sex? Drugs, alchohol, all of those things are pretty much across all music genres at least in some context, as is sex, but nothing is as overtly sexual to me as some of the “tween” acts of today. BTW, I listened to Marilyn Manson and I will totally sensor my future children’s music choices. … Can you hear the gray hair exploding out of my ears and other unfortunate orfices??? … sniffle
Thank you, Jeanne! I am also very glad that my kids want to listen to books on CD more often than anything else. After all, I don’t really need to be explaining what “erbody gettin’ crunk” means (and to be honest, I don’t really know anyway…see my comments about elevators and pie before). I DO, however, love looking back at all the things I did not know were innapropriate…cracks me right up now that I’m old.
HAHAHAHAAAAA – gray hair exploding out of your ears…..HAHAHAHAAAA! I brought M. Manson up b/c I know you listened to him, I was horrified at the time (yes, I was old and cooter-ish even then) and wondered what you opinion was….pls expand?
Stephanie ~ Adam Lambert gave a…shall we say controversial…performance on some awards show a while back (I can’t remember which one!). I didn’t see it when it aired, but I watched pieces of it online later and was pretty floored that it played out on a local channel during a time when kids would be up watching it. I guess it was unplanned/unannounced, though…Mr. Lambert just surprised everyone with it. I don’t know why I don’t remember not understanding some of the song lyrics from the songs of my youth. When I first began really getting interested in music, my tape collection consisted of NKOTB, Menudo, Debbie Gibson, Tiffany, Belinda Carlisle, the Bangles…all that teeny bopper, bubblegum pop! I was just looking through my childhood scrapbook and happened upon one of those “About Me” journals I made in grade school. “My favorite song is ‘We are the World,’ because I like the words.” Has anyone seen the new We are the World video for Haiti, or heard the song? I love it. My mom never bought any tapes for me by Madonna or the like, but I do remember watching videos on MTV when she wasn’t around! I just don’t remember not understanding the lyrics. Maybe because I didn’t really listen to the words but rather the music? I was a dancing fool back in the day, spending most of my time choreographing dance sequences! Oh, and I remember jamming out to the Beastie Boys, LL Cool J, and Vanilla Ice once I got a bit older. Then, after that phase, I remember being in love with hair bands…Skid Row, Motley Crue, and Bon Jovi. Saw my first and only rock concert with my older cousin when I was in 8th grade. Aerosmith! Went through a long country music phase after that, which my mother LOVED. Regarding Marilyn Manson…he scared back then, and he still gives me the shivers today!
Holy Cow! Jessica took me to my first concert and it was….drumroll…AEROSMITH!!! That was the most fun ever. I finally got rid of the shirt that I bought when we were there together with other friends – Jessica, do you remember the shiny purple shirt with their logo on the front? Ohhhh, we were sooo cool. I actually later went to a TypeONegative concert in the same arena – not the same, for some odd reason. Different crowd, too. lol.
LOL…I still have that shirt and was looking at pics from that outing yesterday. We did have a fantastic time, didn’t we?
Yours might be in better shape than mine – I had holes in many places where I’m sure Joe Perry would look cool sporting but I end up just looking like a chic with an old Aerosmith t-shirt on. ahhh, the memories.