I went to the first Memorial Vespers I’ve ever attended this week, on All Soul’s Day. It is a ceremony in which all those members of the parish who have died are remembered and prayed for. The priest called out the names one at a time and a representative of the family lit a candle. There were songs and prayers in between sets of names. There were also candles lit for parishoners and their family members who have died in the more distant past, soldiers and civilians killed in war, silent petitions for loved ones.
My father-in-law lit the candle for his wife.
I spent most of the time I wasn’t praying wishing I’d just left my children in their parish school of religion classes. I didn’t see that they were getting much out of the service. We had accidentally set in the worst possible place – not realizing most of the service would take place next to the baptismal font instead of the lecturn – so the children could not see one single thing. I assumed they were bored and not taking much in. Bedtime was nearing and it had been an active, busy day.
Then I noticed Farmer Boy. He was holding Grandpa’s hand. He was laying his head on Grandpa’s arm. And he was listening.
After the service, Shooter stood with his hand on Grandpa’s shoulder. Then Cowgirl piped up, in her six-year-old confidence on addressing how things are “Grandpa, are you lonely?”
She asked with no reserve, in a matter-of-fact tone.
“Well, sometimes I do. But it helps when you are here,” he answered.
“You should come over to our house more, Grandpa.” Cowgirl suggested.
“Yeah, we are always happy to have you, Gramps,” Added Shooter.
“And you know my Mom?” Cowgirl pitched, “She can even cut you up some apples!”
.
God bless you and your family. I’m crying. I love your post.
Memorial Vespers always touches my heart. For me, when the names are called, it brings to mind the faces and memories of those people who died and their goodness, and it brings a smile to my lips. They blessed our lives, and still do. And then when I see the family members light the candles, I am touched by the love between them and the person who has gone on ahead. And finally, sitting in the quiet sanctuary afterwards, with all those little candles flickering, and the tabernacle in light too, I think of God’s great love for us and of how the light of the people who died is still shining, alive in our hearts and in our lives. I think it’s a beautiful service.
It is amazing what goes on below the surface in prayer. I’ve had classes on Centering Prayer with the middle schoolers the past three years and felt like an idiot talking to the kids about this ancient, silent prayer form, thinking they’re not getting anything out of it and that they must just think I’m a goofy old lady. Then they have the most amazing responses that they share afterwards with the class. It’s awesome how God speaks to us all even when we don’t think anything is going on.
One more thing I love about Memorial Vespers is the sense of community. It’s so comforting to be joined together with one another in the worship space, and to see the grouping of candles, knowing that our loved ones are in company with us and one another, too.
And I think of my mom and grandparents, too, who died years ago. I still miss them and remember them with love.
Okay, I’ve probably rambled on long enough on YOUR blog today!
Off to work I go, heigh-ho!
You have such sweet, sweet children, Jessica.
Precious.
Jessica, it sounds like it was a beautiful evening. I feel as if I was right there the way you describe it. I can see and hear the kids comforting grandpa. How precious they are!
oh I hope grandpa takes your children up on that invitation. they are good medicine. and it sounds like you cut a mean apple…;)